The Food That Made Me

Kids, life gets messy. In the summer of 2026, #1 started to eat solids. She started with chicken stock, egg yolk, a rib bone, mango pit, then bone marrow, then pineapple core.

I wish that I could say that I had a part in it. But, nope. It was all mommy. Mommy made the stock and froze it into ice cubes so that you can have a little bit at a time. Mommy fed you patiently while you learned to sip stock and water. Well, most of it spilled onto the tray. Emi has been having a great time cleaning up your messiness, though.

Where was Daddy? On the sideline watching or cooking. Why? Because #1 being messy was really overwhelming to me. I haven’t been cooking or baking as much lately because the thought of being messy has been too overwhelming.

Mommy and I had a conversation a few days ago that I felt was helpful. She shared that she was sad that I want to help nourish others with soup, but I’m lacking in nourishing her and #1. That hit home. I appreciate her honesty and transparency, as always. It made me recognize that I had some work to do. I shouldn’t be letting my depression or a lack of creativity or lack of cooking muse be affecting how I nourish my family. And I have to figure out why my brain gets so overwhelmed with messes.

Life gets messy. Real messy. Like really really really messy. That messiness is hard. That messiness is annoying and irritating. But, like one of my favorite people says, “We all gotta eat and we are all gonna die.” – Josh Scherer. Eating is a necessity. So, I’m going to go back to the drawing board to figure out how to cook for my wife and kid.

P.S. I have regressed in my cooking skills. I have tried to stir-fry green beans and bake Brussels sprouts and have failed both. More things that I need to figure out.